Pooey’s Rankings Week 2: Translations in English and Lyrics - Perry The Pooey

The Translation of Pooey’s Rankings Week 2 - Perry The Pooey in English and the original Lyrics of the Song
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Lyrics of Pooey’s Rankings Week 2
by Perry The Pooey

1. Now I do what I want vs. Lola’s Real Daddy

I would’ve never guessed this team would be 2-0 and it almost pains me to put him number one, but I compared this team’s week 2 versus the other 2-0 opponents and he beat them both. So this weird mix of a team is playing really well and has a matchup against __ ranked Lola’s Real Daddy. He should move to 3-0 and start the season off on the fast track to a big playoff berth. Good news: Jabari is ahead of schedule. This team will continue to get better

Prediction: 6-3

2. Turd Squad vs. Stuart Scott’s Lazy I

Slowly becoming my favorite team, as always. Zach Lavine returning really only puts this team in a better spot and I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s ranked #1 soon. Please don’t let Austin three-peat. Let’s start exploring collusion ideas. Really though I don’t see this team slowing down. Collison was a steal, Alex Len is gobbling boards, and RHJ is having big games. These aren’t even his “studs”. Spooky.

Prediction: 4-5

3. Flint Tropics vs. MrLeftwrdSlopinPenis

Probably from top to bottom the most balanced team in the league. Offsetting Lillard’s FG% with Cousins and DJ has made for a nice trio. Sabonis has been a steal so far, benefitting from Turner’s absence, and has probably earned himself some extra minutes even with his return. I see this team as a playoff shoe-in, but still not quite there as my favorite to win it.

Prediction: 6-3

4. Stuart Scott’s Lazy I vs. Turd Squad

Aaron Gordon and Jonathon Simmons might end up being two of the biggest steals of the draft. And I think it’s only fair that Clinton has them. Kinda unfair that he’s catching Austin when his team is cooking, but I’m going to predict the upset here. The no big-man strategy is looking pretty decent, and a strategy like that can end up pulling out victories over opponents of any strategy, and I think he finds a way to win this week.

Prediction: 5-4

5. Team Ass vs. Jordan Primal Chaos
Playing this team firsthand it actually impressed me. There’s lots of balance here and lots of things to love even though nothing really jumps out at you. Kinda like a slow-burn grind it out kinda team. Not really particularly strong in any category, but not weak anywhere and with enough variety to win matchups. Joe beat me by only a few rebounds, but a rematch this week might say otherwise.

Prediction: 4-5

6. MrLeftwrdSlopinPenis vs. Flint Tropics

Eric Bledsoe possibly being dealt has opened up the door for Devin Booker and he’s definitely answered that call. I think this team is still bursting with potential, but hasn’t quite shown it yet. Not sure if he’ll have what it takes to overcome the balance of the tropics, but a hot night from the team could turn the tide quick.

Prediction: 3-6

7. Jordan Primal Chaos vs. Team Ass

What a rough week. Injuries on top of injuries. I don’t know what the fuck they were feeding Joe Ingles and Rodney Hood in Utah but they were both out with Gastrointestinal something. Sources say they rubbed curry on each other’s dicks and buttfucked each other or maybe that’s just what they figuratively did to my chances at winning last week. Couple that with injuries to Jonas, Butler, and even Milsap sat a game. But a rematch this week might show whose really boss.

Prediction: 5-4

8. Flat Earth Society vs. EatMyAssLickMyBalls

Drafting and owning the number 1 player must be really fun. I wonder what that feels like. In any given week that Giannis plays 4 games, you’re probably going to lose to Tyler. It might really be that simple. The Freak is that good. And he hasn’t really shown any signs of slowing down. Depth is still an issue, but if Tyler strikes gold on a waiver pickup at some point he could really do well.

Prediction: 5-4

9. EatMyAssLickMyBalls vs. Flat Earth Society

This team has been hot to start the season, riding the hot hands of Vuc, Fournier, Tobias, and KD. But they’ve all just slightly cooled off and that might be enough to have him drop a game this week. I think if he does lose, he’s better than his 1-2 record suggests as this team could really get hot at any time. Charlotte seems to be fairing well without Batum, but this team could use some balance to the roster.
Prediction: 4-5


10. Pippin Ain’t Easy vs. Daytona Trucker Crank

Some of these mid round picks are starting to flex their muscles a bit. TJ Warren and Oladipo are both starting to really heat up. Don’t see a real contender with this roster just yet, but I do see a team that can start stringing together a couple wins. And taking care of an easy opponent like he did last week will earn him that sweet dubya, but won’t bolster his spot in the rankings all that much.

Prediction: 5-4

11. Daytona TruckerCrank vs. Pippin Ain’t Easy

Sometimes things just don’t fall a certain player’s way. And in Rick’s case sometimes things just don’t fall the entire team’s way for a week. Murray is starting to heat up, Kuzma is getting consistent minutes, and Holiday is starting to settle into his role, but will questionable picks like Brolo and Gorgui end up haunting this team?

Prediction: 4-5


12. Lola’s Real Daddy vs. Now I Do What I Want

Honestly not a bad week. Worse things have happened for teams losing one of their first 3 picks. Shoot in my fantasy football league I drafted David Johnson and Zeke with my first 2 picks and now I don’t have either, but I’m still the best team . Kawhi and Turner should return soon and really with how this team has been playing, I don’t see him falling out of contention like I initially thought. He’s making good adds and not giving up. Props to him.

Prediction: 3-6


13. MarkZuckerbergspenis vs. Carson is my name

Having played Ben’s team and looking at last week’s matchups, I can assure you that his team isn’t as bad as his record suggests. He lost both games by 1 category and even that category was super close. A win over Carson will get him back on track and soon skyrocket up the rankings.
Prediction: 6-3

14. Carson is my name vs. MarkZuckerbergspenis

Good god this team is trash. The choice to IR slot Glenn Robinson and not Fultz and lose out on the roster spot is basically the epitome of this entire manager’s decision making. I don’t wanna write anyone off just yet, but man after a strong rookie season, Carson has officially hit the sophomore slump.

Prediction: 3-6

Translation in English of the Song
Pooey’s Rankings Week 2 by Perry The Pooey

1. Now I do what I want vs. Lola’s Real Daddy

I would’ve never guessed this team would be 2-0 and it almost pains me to put him number one, but I compared this team’s week 2 versus the other 2-0 opponents and he beat them both. So this weird mix of a team is playing really well and has a matchup against __ ranked Lola’s Real Daddy. He should move to 3-0 and start the season off on the fast track to a big playoff berth. Good news: Jabari is ahead of schedule. This team will continue to get better

Prediction: 6-3

2. Turd Squad vs. Stuart Scott’s Lazy I

Slowly becoming my favorite team, as always. Zach Lavine returning really only puts this team in a better spot and I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s ranked #1 soon. Please don’t let Austin three-peat. Let’s start exploring collusion ideas. Really though I don’t see this team slowing down. Collison was a steal, Alex Len is gobbling boards, and RHJ is having big games. These aren’t even his “studs”. Spooky.

Prediction: 4-5

3. Flint Tropics vs. MrLeftwrdSlopinPenis

Probably from top to bottom the most balanced team in the league. Offsetting Lillard’s FG% with Cousins and DJ has made for a nice trio. Sabonis has been a steal so far, benefitting from Turner’s absence, and has probably earned himself some extra minutes even with his return. I see this team as a playoff shoe-in, but still not quite there as my favorite to win it.

Prediction: 6-3

4. Stuart Scott’s Lazy I vs. Turd Squad

Aaron Gordon and Jonathon Simmons might end up being two of the biggest steals of the draft. And I think it’s only fair that Clinton has them. Kinda unfair that he’s catching Austin when his team is cooking, but I’m going to predict the upset here. The no big-man strategy is looking pretty decent, and a strategy like that can end up pulling out victories over opponents of any strategy, and I think he finds a way to win this week.

Prediction: 5-4

5. Team Ass vs. Jordan Primal Chaos
Playing this team firsthand it actually impressed me. There’s lots of balance here and lots of things to love even though nothing really jumps out at you. Kinda like a slow-burn grind it out kinda team. Not really particularly strong in any category, but not weak anywhere and with enough variety to win matchups. Joe beat me by only a few rebounds, but a rematch this week might say otherwise.

Prediction: 4-5

6. MrLeftwrdSlopinPenis vs. Flint Tropics

Eric Bledsoe possibly being dealt has opened up the door for Devin Booker and he’s definitely answered that call. I think this team is still bursting with potential, but hasn’t quite shown it yet. Not sure if he’ll have what it takes to overcome the balance of the tropics, but a hot night from the team could turn the tide quick.


Prediction: 3-6

7. Jordan Primal Chaos vs. Team Ass

What a rough week. Injuries on top of injuries. I don’t know what the fuck they were feeding Joe Ingles and Rodney Hood in Utah but they were both out with Gastrointestinal something. Sources say they rubbed curry on each other’s dicks and buttfucked each other or maybe that’s just what they figuratively did to my chances at winning last week. Couple that with injuries to Jonas, Butler, and even Milsap sat a game. But a rematch this week might show whose really boss.

Prediction: 5-4

8. Flat Earth Society vs. EatMyAssLickMyBalls

Drafting and owning the number 1 player must be really fun. I wonder what that feels like. In any given week that Giannis plays 4 games, you’re probably going to lose to Tyler. It might really be that simple. The Freak is that good. And he hasn’t really shown any signs of slowing down. Depth is still an issue, but if Tyler strikes gold on a waiver pickup at some point he could really do well.

Prediction: 5-4

9. EatMyAssLickMyBalls vs. Flat Earth Society

This team has been hot to start the season, riding the hot hands of Vuc, Fournier, Tobias, and KD. But they’ve all just slightly cooled off and that might be enough to have him drop a game this week. I think if he does lose, he’s better than his 1-2 record suggests as this team could really get hot at any time. Charlotte seems to be fairing well without Batum, but this team could use some balance to the roster.
Prediction: 4-5


10. Pippin Ain’t Easy vs. Daytona Trucker Crank

Some of these mid round picks are starting to flex their muscles a bit. TJ Warren and Oladipo are both starting to really heat up. Don’t see a real contender with this roster just yet, but I do see a team that can start stringing together a couple wins. And taking care of an easy opponent like he did last week will earn him that sweet dubya, but won’t bolster his spot in the rankings all that much.

Prediction: 5-4

11. Daytona TruckerCrank vs. Pippin Ain’t Easy

Sometimes

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